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It has been less than a week since our Country has elected our next President. While I have no intention of having a political discussion, I have thought multiple times this week about a story I have read my kids many times, the story of the Chinese Farmer, and so I thought I would share it.
The Chinese Proverb goes something like this….
A farmer and his son had a beloved stallion who helped the family earn a living. One day, the horse ran away and their neighbors exclaimed, “Your horse ran away, what terrible luck!” The farmer replied, “Maybe so. Maybe not. We’ll see.”
A few days later, the horse returned home, leading a few wild mares back to the farm as well. The neighbors shouted out, “Your horse has returned, and brought several horses home with him. What great luck!” The farmer replied, “Maybe so. Maybe not. We’ll see.”
Later that week, the farmer’s son was trying to ride one of the wild mares and she threw him to the ground, breaking his leg. The villagers cried, “Your son broke his leg, what terrible luck!” The farmer replied, “Maybe so. Maybe not. We’ll see.”
A few weeks later, soldiers marched through town, drafting all the able-bodied boys for the army. They did not take the farmer’s son, who was still recovering from his injury. Friends shouted, “Your boy is spared, what tremendous luck!” To which the farmer replied, “Maybe so. Maybe not. We’ll see.”
————
For me, the meaning of this story is that no event, in and of itself, can truly be judged as good or bad, fortunate or unfortunate, lucky or unlucky, but that only time will reveal the whole story. It is a comforting reminder that I am often in the middle of the story, and that there is still much to unfold before me.
Back in 2008, I was engaged to be married. For various reasons, our wedding was cancelled and our relationship ended only 6-weeks before our wedding date. It was certainly not the outcome I planned or anticipated. Every worst scenario about my future was playing out in my head like a bad movie, preventing my sleep and stunting my clarity. If I judged my life at that point in my story (which I absolutely did!) it would have been horrible and unfortunate.
Fast forward to today: November of 2016. I am happily married to my true soulmate. We celebrated our 7 year anniversary a few weeks ago and have three beautiful children. I now look back at those same events of 2008 with a completely different perspective at this point in my story—a story which is still evolving!
What I once labeled as “one of the most horrible things I could ever go through” I now see as “one of the times in my life I learned and grew the most”. That doesn’t change or discount all my sadness and pain. But those events did give me a greater perspective that I have remembered at other times in my life, such as this one, when I catch myself judging something as bad, unlucky, unfortunate, or out of my control: that I might simply see what happens next.
I’ve been through difficult medical diagnoses, been forced to deal with unexpected natural disasters, and countless heartbreaks and disappointments. Most of us have.
For much of my life I have found great comfort in having things planned, predictable, and comfortable (and I still do in many ways). I certainly also believe in being an active participant in change, whether that is your health, the environment, politics, etc.
But I am also learning to get more comfortable with the unknown, more “friendly” with the things that do not go the way I had hoped or anticipated—allowing myself to become open to all the possibilities of what may come.
Love the Chinese farmer story!
Thanks Debbie!
Thanks for sharing. Those have been my thoughts exactly about the election results.
This is such a healthy mindset. I aspire to think this way every time I face adversity in my daily life and beyond. Thank you
So good, shared on my page. Thank you!
Very much appreciate how you didn’t directly address either candidate. Thank you.
I really needed to remember this perspective, and continue to remember it! Thank you so much, Debbie!
just love dr. roy! thanks for the chinese proverb 🙂
Debbie!
I LOVE this email. Thank you so much for sharing the beautiful story and delicious recipe.
Hope you guys are doing great, have a lovely week.
Love,
Jenny
So lovely, thanks for sharing!
Great story Debbie and a great reminder!! xoxo
Thanks for this.
Thank you for the the reminder Debbie — that is one of my favorite stories, read countless times to my son. Perfect allegory to where we find ourselves now. This is the first thing I have read in the past week that has actually lifted my spirits by reminding me that judging a situation as strictly “bad” — regardless of how dire it may seem — does nothing to raise one’s consciousness. There are many unknowns, the universe is full of surprises. And while that does not preclude one from taking action for what they believe in, it does serve as a reminder to look for the pearls, that are otherwise hidden, along the way.
Thank you!
Good one! I love the Chinese Farmer Story.
Debbie,
Thanks for sharing this story and yours, I loved ready both! Hope you all are doing well.
Thank you all so much for taking the time to comment on this post. It means so much to me that it resonated with you!!
Debbie – thank you for a *healthy* perspective with the Chinese proverb. We have also read that story many times…
Debbie, Thank you for sharing this story.
Your Chinese Farmer brought a little bit of light to dark times. Thank you for that. Being surrounded by community that understands the devastation of what just happened has provided comfort.
Love the Chinese Farmer story also! It is always nice to have a reminder that there are so many things in life that we don’t always understand in the moment and something with a greater purpose may be at work. Love stories like this ❤